The Cycle of Life

On Tuesday, February 26, 2013 I woke up with a text from my brother Ralph that said my dad had been taken to the hospital. At first it didn't seem too alarming as my brother said it was just a bad case of the flu. At this point, I was thinking that they would keep him for a few days, run some tests and then we'd all be back to our normal lives. 

Unfortunately, I was wrong and my dad suffered a life threatening stroke. After I talked to my brothers and found out he was stable, I felt a small relief but I was scared to death being 500 miles from home. 

I flew home the next day and it was the weirdest feeling landing in Pittsburgh to see my family, and not being excited. Getting to the hospital I was greeted by my mom, Nunny (my grandma) and two brothers. It was nice to see them, and be with them in this tragic time, but it's something I wish never happened. 

Going back to see my dad was the hardest thing I have ever done in all my twenty years. To see the man who has been a super hero to me, laying there scared and confused was heart breaking. 

For those of you who don't know my dad, suffered a life threatening stroke. Walking down the halls of the hospital I was prepared to see him connected to all the tubes and machines. SO when I walked in, that part wasn't the hard part. But when my dad opened his eyes and I saw the fear and confusion in his eyes, my heart was shattered into a million pieces. Fighting back tears, so that he knew everything would be okay, I grabbed his hand telling him everything would be okay and we'd get through this. Motionless, I could see the pain and pure fear in his eyes, but it wasn't until my brother asked him something that made me lose it. My brother asked my dad to do something so simple, something that we took for granted. My oldest brother Ralph had asked my dad to squeeze my hand, and when there was no movement or reaction in any way, I broke down. Here I am standing at the side of my dad's bed looking down at him with no movement, and to think about all the things we have been through over the past twenty years, I couldn't fathom the fact that he couldn't squeeze my hand. 

This was especially hard on my brothers and I because to us, my dad was the definition of tough, and especially so on us. He was so hard on us when it came to sports, he pushed us harder than you can think and expected perfection out of us each game. From getting kicked out of dugouts, to having to ride home with my mom, to telling me I should quit because I'm that bad, it was never easy to please him. But with that being said, it something I am most thankful for looking back, because if it wasn't for my dad being so hard on us, we would have never worked as hard as we did and wouldn't become the men we are today. 

Although he was hard on us in sports, there is not a more respectful, loving and caring man. The opportunities and things he has done for me, my brothers and my mom throughout our lives cannot be matched. 

Being 500 miles away from home during this trying time has been tough, but the love and support I have received has been awesome. I have dedicated this time to my studies so that I can give my dad something to be proud about when I return home this summer. 

He has continued to improve each week, and is now beginning to walk with the help of his therapists. He is still in an intensive rehab but is hoping to return home in May. The prayers we have received from people across the country has been remarkable and have certainly been noticed in his healing process. We ask for continued prayers for his memory to come back and peace in his heart as he is becoming more aware. He has a hard time each day, being told about this tragedy and gets saddened, but with support and prayers I am confident he'll be back to normal one day, looking back at this as simply a big bump in the road. 

Beating the Odds

Bruce (#7) and Gino (#66) Gradkowski

after their two teams met during the 2012 

regular season.

It all starts as a young boy and continues all the way in to adult hood. But there comes a time in every mans life, when the realization settles in that he won't become a professional athlete. We grow up playing every sport, dreaming to make it to the pros and be just like our favorite players. Through the eyes of an optimistic toddler, it seems so possible and easy, we think if they can do it then so can I. Unfortunately, just about all of us have that dream come to an end. Professional athletes are rare for people to see and be around, whether its them going to your high school, living in your area, or playing in conference. For most people in America, their relationship with a professional athlete is through a television, during game time of their favorite team. However, there are some people that are fortunate and get to be a part of a professional athletes life. These people are so lucky, not because they know someone famous and not because they know someone with a lot of money, but because they get to witness something so rare, they get to witness the journey of a professional athlete. The talent and athleticism are God given to most, but a lot of the time, that's not enough to make it. When God gives you a talent, he is giving you an opportunity and he is giving you a choice..most people aren't willing to sacrifice the time and dedication, and hard work that it takes to use your talents. They are simply choosing to not use the ability God has given them. In anything you do in life, whether it's sports or something else, talent can only take you so far and in order to be the best and rise above everyone else, you must work harder than them.

I consider myself lucky to have the family I do and experience the things that I do especially in relation to athletics. The memories and moments we've shared as a family watching these two participate at the highest level is indescribable.

The most recent was my trip to New Orleans for SUper Bowl XLVII in which my cousin Gino played in. Serving as a back up linemen, he was a starter on special teams. The experience was a dream, I was living the high-life for a week, and then to see Gino bring home his first Super Bowl ring was an awesome feeling. It made me think back to when I was on the sideline as the ball boy for when he and my cousin Carmen won the WPIAL Championship at Heinz Field in 2004.

To experience the things I have because of these guys can't be matched, but more so than all the fame and success, they haven't changed a thing about them. They are still the same exact people they've always been. To have these two guys so close to me and also have them serve as role models, has been a blessing. They have taught me that no matter how rich or famous you become, the only thing that can make you truly happy is the loved one's in your life. I will always cherish the memories they have blessed my family an I with but more importantly I will never forget the lessons they have taught me throughout the years.

Tiger Woods: "Winning Takes Care of Everything"

           

          Arguably the largest sex scandal in professional sports happened in 2009 involving the greatest golfer to ever live, Tiger Woods. Woods was a heroic sports icon to everyone before 2009 and was one of the few class act role models in professional sports. Tiger Woods was so appealing to fans not only for his win count, but for the way he won. Woods was a man amongst boys who is the greatest golfer to ever live. The magical moments we have gotten from Tiger Woods are countless. To watch him as a young adult put on that red Nike shirt for the Sunday round, you knew it was never over until the final put. From the time he was just a young boy, Woods was in the spotlight, and handled it oddly ‘perfectly.’ That was until one afternoon in 2009, when news stations began to report Tiger Woods was omitted into the hospital for getting beaten up with his own driver.

Tiger got punished and beaten pretty badly. Evidence came out and we began to connect the dots until it eventually came out that Tiger Woods had cheated on his wife. For those of you who don’t know, Elin Nordegren, who is now Tigers ex-wife, is a beautiful model. Tiger Woods slept with a plethora of women and although he publically apologized and promised to change, he didn’t but instead stayed selfish. Nike recently released a Tiger Woods ad stating, “Winning Takes Care of Everything” and its obvious Tiger cleared this statement before it was published. This just shows how Tiger’s sincere apologies and promises to change was all a bunch of BS. Nike is also at fault for this, but they don’t care because they will benefit from this ad.

            People in our society either love or hate this ad, and the same goes for Tiger Woods. He went from being one of the most famous, well-liked professional athletes of all time into a liar, cheater and embarrassment. Just about every female in the world hates Tiger Woods for what he did, but there are still many men out there who root for Tiger just as faithfully as they did before the 2009 incident. It seems that men realize that the sex scandal doesn’t affect their lives in any way, so they’ll look past that and simply judge Tiger Woods based on his golf game. I regretfully admit that I am a big Tiger Woods fan, always have been and always will be. My reason to back this up is simple. Even before all of this unraveled and reached the media, I was a huge Tiger fan and the sex scandal hasn’t changed my opinion in any way. The reason being is because prior to 2009 I like Tiger Woods as a golfer and only a golfer. I didn’t like Tiger because he was a well-kept together man of class. Not once did I ever root for Tiger to hit a big time putt just because he’s a loyal husband. I was a fan of Tiger the golfer, and nothing more. The only time I ever watched him was when he was playing in tournaments from Thursday to Sunday. There was never a time when I sat in front of the television and watched Tiger starring in a reality TV series.

            I’m not saying what Tiger Woods did in 2009 was right but I’m personally saying I am a fan of him as a golfer and I don’t care what he does outside the course, unless it personally affects me. In terms of the ad that Nike put out, I don’t believe it is all that wrong. Because this happened four years ago and like everyone else should, Tiger moved on. Without the family life, Tiger’s main and only focus now is golf. The ad is simply for all the haters, not the haters who say that he’s a cheater, but the ones that said he couldn’t bounce back from that scandal. Woods receives just as much if not more criticism than any athlete in the world. People want to see him fail, they want him to suffer in misery and the only way Tiger can shut them up is by winning.    

Every single golfer as well as athletes in the world play their respective sports, to win. They’re miserable when they lose and ecstatic when they win. The competitive nature of our society is remarkable and exciting. The same goes for Tiger Woods, he wants to win every time he steps on the course and like we’ve all experienced, when we win all of our other problems don’t seem as bad anymore.

Women in Sports

      In our society today we see marketing and advertising everywhere. In order to be successful you have to be able to get people to believe in you or your company. Not long after the WNBA was introduced, Sheryl Swoopes was drafted and immediately became the face of the WNBA in which they used her to promote the league. Not long after she signed her contract with Nike, it was announced she would miss a chunk of the season on maternity leave. Swoopes thought her Nike endorsement was in jeopardy, but the WNBA embraced this situation instead. They began to use her as advertisement, even on the front page of sports magazines. Swoopes returned back to action over a month into the season and went on to have a great career, winning three MVP awards and two additional Olympic gold medals. However, in 2005 she addressed the media releasing a statement admitting to being lesbian.

            Although, it was a surprise to many, Swoopes didn’t receive the hatred or criticism that we would see if a male athlete released the same statement. The reason I believe that a male would be tormented more than Swoopes is because I believe it all has to do with how society views athletes differently based on gender. Male athletes are viewed as tough, strong and athletic players who are tough and fearless. People would look at them thinking they cant be tough if they were gay. On the other hand, females are seen to be more consistent, fundamentally sound players who aren’t idolized for their strong physique or toughness. If a man comes out and says he’s gay, well then it ruins his whole image of being a “man” in his sport. The reason society thinks that is because of another stereotype on the way they view gays. Society believes that all gay men are skinny, weak and girly. Therefore, a male athlete would get tormented if he were gay because everyone would automatically view him as a stereotypical gat, even if it were Ray Lewis. That’s just how our naïve and cruel society works, thinks and acts.

            Like I mentioned above, society views athletes, both male and female as if they should play a certain way. If you look online you will see a numerous amount of articles and videos on people criticizing Brittney Griner, for the lone reason of, “she plays like a dude.” People cancel out her accomplishments and fame by arguing the fact that she doesn’t play like a typical girl should. In men’s sports, you get crushed and booed if you don’t play tough and physical. Then you’re viewed as ‘soft’ or a ‘sissy.’ And if you didn’t play tough or fearless, a coach would not tolerate it and force you too be tough, as we all saw in all the leaked footage of Mike Rice physically hitting players. All of these opinions are coming from people who watch the game and don’t play it. Yes, I know it seems cruel and naïve, but they are entitled to their own opinion because without them, sports would not exist.

The only way they can overcome all the hatred and criticism is to block it out, continue to play their way and succeed. There is nothing that will drive a hater crazier than for them to see someone or some team they hate win. For instance, Brittney Griner blocked out all the bad publicity and played the way she always has. Although many people hated it, they grew to respect her because she kept her mouth shut and dominated day in and day out. There will come a time when people realize their stupidity and look back on how special she really was as a player. Because last time I checked, in sports the objective is to be great and you conquer that by your own unique style of play.

            Although it’s not to the extent of racism, there are very many similarities between the two issues. Back in the day people would automatically think African Americans couldn’t play sports or do anything for that matter. White’s didn’t know, but they didn’t give them a chance to prove themselves and they just viewed someone for what society thought. Today in sports, we do the same thing to a certain extent. Even though it might be true that it’s less competitive, there is never women’s sports covered on any sports channels and if it is, it’s a big game where they have no choice. That’s because we believe women can’t do what men can do, just like we thought blacks cant do what whites do. But there will come a day, similar to the day Jackie Robinson had his first major league game, where a women will stand up and take on a man. Even though she might not win, she will be a symbolic figure for women by showing her courage on behalf of women’s sports. Then people look at this thinking; wow maybe women can be tough too.

            On this day, men’s sports are far superior in the eyes of society and media just like in the early 1900’s when whites were far superior to blacks. Jackie Robinson had the courage to break the color barrier and change the lives of African American’s forever, who’s going to break the gender barrier and make a change for women?