Sunday, April 28, 2013

The Cycle of Life


On Tuesday, February 26, 2013 I woke up with a text from my brother Ralph that said my dad had been taken to the hospital. At first it didn't seem too alarming as my brother said it was just a bad case of the flu. At this point, I was thinking that they would keep him for a few days, run some tests and then we'd all be back to our normal lives. 

Unfortunately, I was wrong and my dad suffered a life threatening stroke. After I talked to my brothers and found out he was stable, I felt a small relief but I was scared to death being 500 miles from home. 

I flew home the next day and it was the weirdest feeling landing in Pittsburgh to see my family, and not being excited. Getting to the hospital I was greeted by my mom, Nunny (my grandma) and two brothers. It was nice to see them, and be with them in this tragic time, but it's something I wish never happened. 

Going back to see my dad was the hardest thing I have ever done in all my twenty years. To see the man who has been a super hero to me, laying there scared and confused was heart breaking. 

For those of you who don't know my dad, suffered a life threatening stroke. Walking down the halls of the hospital I was prepared to see him connected to all the tubes and machines. SO when I walked in, that part wasn't the hard part. But when my dad opened his eyes and I saw the fear and confusion in his eyes, my heart was shattered into a million pieces. Fighting back tears, so that he knew everything would be okay, I grabbed his hand telling him everything would be okay and we'd get through this. Motionless, I could see the pain and pure fear in his eyes, but it wasn't until my brother asked him something that made me lose it. My brother asked my dad to do something so simple, something that we took for granted. My oldest brother Ralph had asked my dad to squeeze my hand, and when there was no movement or reaction in any way, I broke down. Here I am standing at the side of my dad's bed looking down at him with no movement, and to think about all the things we have been through over the past twenty years, I couldn't fathom the fact that he couldn't squeeze my hand. 

This was especially hard on my brothers and I because to us, my dad was the definition of tough, and especially so on us. He was so hard on us when it came to sports, he pushed us harder than you can think and expected perfection out of us each game. From getting kicked out of dugouts, to having to ride home with my mom, to telling me I should quit because I'm that bad, it was never easy to please him. But with that being said, it something I am most thankful for looking back, because if it wasn't for my dad being so hard on us, we would have never worked as hard as we did and wouldn't become the men we are today. 

Although he was hard on us in sports, there is not a more respectful, loving and caring man. The opportunities and things he has done for me, my brothers and my mom throughout our lives cannot be matched. 

Being 500 miles away from home during this trying time has been tough, but the love and support I have received has been awesome. I have dedicated this time to my studies so that I can give my dad something to be proud about when I return home this summer. 

He has continued to improve each week, and is now beginning to walk with the help of his therapists. He is still in an intensive rehab but is hoping to return home in May. The prayers we have received from people across the country has been remarkable and have certainly been noticed in his healing process. We ask for continued prayers for his memory to come back and peace in his heart as he is becoming more aware. He has a hard time each day, being told about this tragedy and gets saddened, but with support and prayers I am confident he'll be back to normal one day, looking back at this as simply a big bump in the road. 

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